How White Men Fight by Tucker Carlson

Fox News thought they could cancel me, but they forgot one very important thing: How white men fight. My name is Tucker Carlson and I’m white. If you’re a white man like me, you probably already know that white men fight in an honorable fashion, unlike the dusky hordes invading our open borders who know …

Republicans: “We May Have to Do January 6th Again if Trump Indicted.”

Republicans are warning the country that, although they really really don’t want to, they may be forced to do the January 6th insurrection all over again with all its attendant vandalism, attacks on law enforcement, threats to the lives of public officials and smearing of feces on pertinent government landmarks if President Trump is indicted …

Sean Hannity: Deep Deep State

How insidious is the Deep State? It’s so insidious that even apparently stalwart patriots, such as Fox News personality Sean Hannity, can be secretly carrying out its sinister designs. How else can one describe Mr. Hannity’s January 10th, 2020 text message to Trump’s Chief of Staff Mark Meadows and Congressman Jim Jordan that “He (Trump) …

“Gravity is Real” Says Arkansas Man Injured in Cliff Jump

Jimmy Ray Fulton thought gravity was a Deep State conspiracy when he leaped off the eighty foot cliff at Heber Springs without a cable or harness. People at the popular cliff jumping site in Arkansas had warned him that jumping off a cliff with no cable or harness was dangerous, but the twenty-seven year old …

MAGA Jesus Arrested for January 6th Riot

Washington, DC — MAGA Jesus was arrested by the FBI Wednesday after a social media contact reported his post from January 6th boasting that “Me and my patriot disciples are kicking some f*cking Deep State ass today! Yea, behold my righteous pummeling of the iniquitous sons of Satan!” The post included a photo of MAGA …

Jailed January 6th Rioter Now Realizes He was Antifa All Along

Mike Jaworski was sure he was a staunch supporter of former President Trump. He voted for Trump twice, attended several rallies where he screamed “build the wall” and “lock her up,” and had a thirty foot long Trump flag in front of his home. He flouted COVID 19 restrictions, contracted the disease, gave it to …

Candide 2020

In the suburb of Westphalia in San Bernardino County of Southern California in the mansion of the Senior Pastor of the Cathedral of the Holy Lamb’s Divine Florescence there lived a youth of wholesome disposition and unpretentious simplicity named Candide. He was the offspring of the charismatic preacher’s sister Kimberly and a former maintenance worker …

Nebulous “Divisiveness” Brings Unpleasantness to Capitol

As a prominent conservative Republican politician, I feel it is my duty to address the unpleasantness that occurred at the U.S. Capitol yesterday. It is critical for all of us to register our distress at what happened in a vague and oblique manner, taking care not to reflexively point fingers in anger at those who …

Leftist Mobs Look Forward to Destroying America January 20th

America-hating, radical leftist groups with poor hygiene are looking forward to terrorizing good, clean, conservative, white American citizens come January 20th, according to statements from various unshaven bolshevik traitors. “Joe Biden’s 47 years of posing as a centrist, moderate Democrat have finally paid off,” Ian McCormick, National Director of the Gay Socialist Jihadi Drum Circle …