In a bid to support their president’s tough immigration policies, hundreds of thousands of white Trump supporters around the country are taking backbreaking, low-paying agricultural jobs usually done by immigrants. The surprise movement, which emerged suddenly out of nowhere, has been dubbed the “Caucasian Campesinos” by the media.
One of these hardy Trump supporters, Stephanie Briggs, a blond, blue-eyed strawberry picker in Watsonville, California, said she felt she needed to do more to support the president’s policies. “You know, like everybody else, I was sharing the anti-Mexican memes on Facebook and screaming ‘Build the Wall’ at Trump rallies. But then I realized that the problem cannot be solved by the government building the wall alone. Real American patriots like me have to step up and do the grueling, dirty, thankless jobs they say we won’t do and do them with a smile.”
After Briggs’ supervisor shouted at her to get back to work, she stepped back into the field. “Gotta get back to work,” she said with a chipper grin. “But you know, the long hours of stooping and picking in the baking sun with few bathroom breaks, low pay, and primitive living conditions is a small price to pay for preserving America for real Americans.”