Franz Kafka and the Inferno of Love

It hit me late one night when I was in the bookstore after my girlfriend had locked me out of the house. Suffering through the most devastating case of writer’s block I had ever had, I had somewhat rashly destroyed a little furniture. Then at Stacey’s insistence, I went down to retrieve the remnants of …

New Conservative History Museum Shows that Slavery was “Just a Passing Phase”

Charleston, South Carolina. A new conservative American History museum is slated to open in Charleston this month that will illustrate that “slavery was just a passing phase the young republic experienced,” according to Museum Director Cody Ralston. “I went through a Goth phase when I was in high school,” Ralston noted at a press conference …

Is Country Music Too Intellectual?

Some music critics are growing unsettled by the recent trend in Country Music toward more cerebral themes and elaborate concept albums they fear is tearing the genre from its humble roots. Carter McFarland, editor of Country Music Today, worries that some artists are drifting too far from the fundamentals. “We’ve got some folks out there …

Smut-pushing Librarians Bagged in Missouri Parental Library Review Board Raids

Dozens of librarians were apprehended in a series of lightning dawn raids around the “Show Me” state for violating the recently passed Parental Oversight of Public Libraries Act. The act forbids library employees from providing access to minors of books “deemed to be age-inappropriate sexual material” by five member panels elected by local communities. Although …

Militant Vegans Seize Steakhouses Throughout Country

A network of radical vegans has engaged in a widespread covert takeover of steakhouses throughout the country, drugging and indoctrinating owners and staff and transforming the restaurants into bastions of veganism. In March of 2019, Margaret and Joseph Huddleston of White Plains, New York went to Ike’s Steakhouse for the Tuesday Night Prime Rib Special …

Jane Austen-Henry Miller Collaboration to Be Published

A manuscript discovered in a London attic in 2016 confirmed the long rumored literary collaboration between Jane Austen and Henry Miller. After the resolution of legal disputes between the heirs of the Austen and Miller estates, the work is finally to be published this year. Dangerous Neighbors presents an exclusive excerpt published for the very …