Texas and Arizona have run out of space to store the bodies of victims of the Cornonavirus Hoax. But don’t worry if you live in the Lone Star or Grand Canyon states. You don’t have to wear an uncomfortable mask or practice social distancing because Uncle Sam’s got the freedom-loving Sun Belt states’ backs.

FEMA sent eight refrigerated morgue trucks to Texas in April and will be sending fourteen more next week. Arizona has requested some of the portable coolers as well so problem solved! No putrefying bodies will be unceremoniously dumped on the streets of San Antonio or Phoenix.

The trucks are filling up quickly but for a limited time you can reserve a space for yourself by registering on www.refrigerateme.com and paying a small, refundable deposit. And with Texas racking up record numbers of new cases almost daily and no statewide mask mandates in either state, you can bet the hoax victims will soon be cheek by jowl in those coolers, so claim your spot today!