As the rest of the world urgently prepares for a potential pandemic that has already apparently claimed the lives of 2,700 people and sickened as many as 80,000 worldwide, President Trump and his Republican supporters are not being taken in.
Radio host and Medal of Freedom recipient Rush Limbaugh sought to bring clarity to the rapidly unfolding situation with his own uniquely cogent analysis on Monday. “It looks like the coronavirus is being weaponized as yet another element to bring down Donald Trump,” he said, going on to explain that the virus was nothing more than “the common cold” being over-hyped by the media in an attempt “to get Trump.”
After accusing the media and Democrats of magnifying “the common cold,” however, Limbaugh went on to claim that the coronavirus was, in fact, whipped up in a “Chicom” (Chinese Communist) laboratory. “I’m telling you, the Chicoms are trying to weaponize this thing,” he argued. “Every nation is working on things like this, and the Chicoms obviously in their lab are doing something here with the coronavirus–and it got out.”
President Trump was also not fooled by the media hysteria about the disease. At a press conference in New Delhi, India Tuesday, he insisted the situation was “under control” and was a “problem that’s going to go away,” in spite of the fact that the Director of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention National Center for Immunization and Respiratory Diseases Nancy Messonnier warned that the disease will certainly spread in the United States. Trump’s economic advisor Larry Kudlow, an expert on infectious diseases, also noted that containment of the virus was “pretty close to air-tight.”
Trump’s Director of the Department of Conspiracies, Richard Trumball, said he thought Rush Limbaugh was on the right track with his Chicom laboratory conspiracy but hadn’t taken it far enough. “Rush hinted at Bernie Sander’s involvement with the Chicoms over there, but I’ll do him one better. Sanders has funneled money from George Soros and Planned Parenthood to the Chinese government to develop a disease that will kill conservatives all over the world. I’ve got Giuliani heading over there to research it. If you don’t believe me, call Rudy.”