Governors in three Sun Belt states who previously had fought bravely against the tyranny of government anti-Coronavirus measures have suddenly and inexplicably caved into political correctness and imposed the heavy hand of the state on their freedom-loving peoples. Using the pretense of record-breaking daily Coronavirus infection rates in their respective states, Republican governors Greg Abbott …
Continue reading “Sun Belt Governors Turn to Tyranny After COVID-19 Freedom Spikes”
It is a little known fact today that George Washington overreached his authority and unilaterally ordered a quarantine of American citizens fleeing the British occupation of Boston and an outbreak of smallpox in the city in 1775. The tyrannical general, who had recently arrived in Cambridge to take command of the new Continental Army in …
Continue reading “Tyrant George Washington Trampled Colonists’ Rights With Quarantine in 1775”
Many churches are offering “Holy Hydroxychloroquine” to lure wary parishioners back to in-person services after a string of outbreaks linked to recent large religious gatherings has diminished confidence in God’s ability to protect them from the deadly Cononavirus. Both Protestant and Catholic Churches are offering varying forms of the drug, which has the blessing of …
Recently, as I have been following the national conversation about the Coronavirus, I came to a realization about my own doctor. He is an unelected elitist with an obsessive devotion to medical science, and therefore I can no longer permit him to be the steward of my health. Allowing one person to dictate to me …
Continue reading “I Said Goodbye to My Unelected, Elitist Doctor”
The summer barbecue season is looking bleaker every day as workers continue to sicken and die from the Coronavirus apparently contracted at meatpacking plants around the country, and their stubborn coworkers stay home or demand onerous safety regulations. Fortunately, the Trump administration has ordered meatpacking workers back to work while promising liability protection for wealthy …
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Lansing, Michigan. The sputtering, red-faced, gun-toting white men storming the Capitol Thursday were an intimidating sight, screaming into the faces of policemen without wearing masks and shouting “Lock her up” as they protested the shelter-in-place order Governor Gretchen Whitmer has issued at the suggestion of virtually every credible medical expert on the planet. But now …
Continue reading “Michigan Lockdown Protesters Grounded After Whitmer Calls Their Parents”
No needles! No hospitals! No nurses whining about the lack of PPE! Now you can overcome the dreaded effects of the Coronavirus by simply sipping a delightful summer beverage created by the brilliant mixologists and scientists of the Trump organization. President Trump recently ruffled the feathers of stuffy, Deep State scientists and medical professionals by …
Washington D.C. President Trump is planning to send what he is now calling “Victory Ventilators” to states where people are protesting against shelter-in-place orders encouraged by his own administration’s guidelines. “These patriots are putting themselves at great risk of catching the virus in order to protest the totally unnecessary orders designed to protect them from …
Parched Thistle Prairie, Texas. An Evangelical swingers club, which had defied Texas Governor Greg Abbott’s April 2nd Stay-at-Home order and continued with its Wednesday night “Commingle for Christ” orgies, has finally halted the weekly event after three of its members perished from COVID-19 and another seven have become infected. The group, which calls itself “The …
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Patriots and Constitutional scholars around the nation have begun to rise up and defy the left-wing, modern medical science that has needlessly brought the economy to a standstill and cast the long, sinister shadow of socialism over our fruited plains. Ironically, the focal point of the rebellion is in Idaho, a state that now has …
Continue reading “Ammon Bundy Vows to Soak in Bathtub of Coronavirus Spittle at Easter Service”
