An English Village in 1348. PETER, a peasant in his thirties is sitting by a well, reading a book. Suddenly, several panicked villagers, some with large bumps or boils on their faces, run past. NIGEL, another peasant in his thirties enters running. PETER: Nigel, what’s going on? NIGEL stops and doubles over, catching his breath. …
Category Archives: Comedy
Off the Deep State End (a Playlet about Your Fox News-Watching Uncle Phil)
The front yard of a middle class home. GLADYS, a woman in her sixties, is pruning flowers. HERB, an elderly mailman, enters with his mailbag. HERB: Morning, Gladys. GLADYS: Hi, Herb, how you doing? HERB: Fine. Looks like it’s going to be a hot one. GLADYS: Looks like it. HERB pulls some mail out of …
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Quarterback’s Primitive Religion Boosts Cougars’ Title Hopes
At first his teammates and some of their parents were alarmed by the primitive religious rituals quarterback Mark Shroeder was performing in the locker room before Winfield High School football games. And then they started winning. And winning some more. The Cougars are 7-0 and seem to be a lock for the state championship game …
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Jane Austen-Henry Miller Collaboration to Be Published
A manuscript discovered in a London attic in 2016 confirmed the long rumored literary collaboration between Jane Austen and Henry Miller. After the resolution of legal disputes between the heirs of the Austen and Miller estates, the work is finally to be published this year. Dangerous Neighbors presents an exclusive excerpt published for the very …
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Trump: All Republicans Must Roll in Shit to Prove Loyalty
Washington D.C. A memo from the White House has been circulating among Republican members of Congress as the Democrats’ impeachment inquiry ramps up. The memo, leaked to reporters by an unnamed Republican, demands that “all Republicans roll in shit in the presence of the Commander in Chief to prove their loyalty to him during the …
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My Spiritual Awakening at the Doghouse Sports Bar
My dark journey to spiritual death and rebirth began with a series of seemingly minor setbacks. I lost my job as a carnival ride operator when a mechanical malfunction entirely beyond my control maimed some people, who, it later turned out, had purchased discount tickets. My employers pinned the blame on me simply because they …
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Satanic Barber Shop Quartet Delivers Lucifer’s Message with Harmony and Whimsy
The Jaunty Jackals shocked the world Friday night when they took the Best New Artist prize at the Satanic Music Awards, leaving presumed winner Tiffany Eldridge and her fans fuming in the audience. The Jackals, a barber shop quartet composed of four middle-aged gents with top hats and silken vocal cords, seem unlikely stars, but …
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The Smell of the Greasepaint Through the Ages: A History of Western Theater/Part I
The Greeks All theater as we know it today is derived from the dithyramb, a ritual dance performed at festivals honoring the god Dionysus in Ancient Greece. The origins of the dithyramb, which roughly translated means “drunken goat dance,” are obscure, but scholars believe it may have evolved from the ritual sacrifice of a goat. …
Scroungy Street Preacher Named Trump’s Conspiracy Czar
Washington, D.C. President Trump appointed veteran street preacher Richard Trumball to be the Director of his new Department of Conspiracies on Friday. Trumball, who has been a disheveled, obnoxious fixture on the corner of 4th and Reed streets in Columbus, Ohio for more than a decade, is well known to locals for ranting about wild …
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“Good-Guy-With-a-Gun” Stunned He Boosted Death Toll
Would-be “Good-Guy-With-a-Gun” Damian Willard, who attempted to shoot the suspect of America’s latest mass shooting Tuesday night at the outdoor Norwegian Blues Festival in Parched Thistle Prairie, Texas, was disappointed that he instead inflicted three additional fatalities on the festival goers. “I’m not sure what happened,” a shaken Willard said in an interview Wednesday with …
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